Another quiet day in the office with the monthly birthday celebration where we stand around awkwardly singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to people we barely know. This is usually a well-attended event mainly because it allows everyone to take a guiltless, hour-long break from work and eat cake. Then there is the camaraderie, bonding with coworkers, and spending time chatting instead of working. Wait, I already mentioned that.

I also manage to work in three sets of ping-pong with one of my coworkers in the afternoon. I lose in three straight sets, but enjoy the battle and especially killing time at work. It is highly likely that I won the movie ticket raffle, but forget where I put my ticket. Needless to say, I later find the ticket in my pocket.

The Raptor heads out before 2 p.m. looking tired since he had date night with the wife the night before. He did not say anything to me that was work related and essentially just greeted me. It does not get any better than this in here.


This is a post in a series based on my time working at a Fortune 500 company. These posts are taken directly from a journal I decided to keep after witnessing numerous unbelievable and ridiculous incidents. All names have been changed to protect the privacy of the innocent―as well as the guilty. The head of my department is referred to as ‘Raptor,’ which was the nickname given to him by one of my coworkers. Last I checked, Raptor was still employed in the same role at this company.